Jealousy is generally found among equals or near equals like friends of equal social status, colleagues in the office and relatives. We are not jealous of someone who is either too highly placed or too distantly connected with us.
Jealousy keeps us under a sense of discouraging frustration and disappointment. It makes us gloomy. It is such a depressing feeling that we cannot tell about it to even our best friends nor can we contain it within ourselves. Consequently, it leaves us with an inconvenience of a peculiar misery and if allowed to grow unchecked beyond a limit, it works like a slow poison to our healthy nature.
The question is how to annihilate this? The following suggestions may help…
1. Stop comparing yourself with others. Comparisons are always harmful. If they are in your favor, they bring false pride in you; if against you, they depress you. Pride can make you overconfident and eventually can be the cause of your downfall. Conversely, with jealousy you lose self-reliance, seek unjust methods of putting down your friend, colleague or relative, and ultimately end up in frustration. So to bring jealousy under your control, avoid comparing yourself with others as much as possible. Think that you are unique because that is how God wanted you to be. Pursue in all seriousness your own ideal, whatever it is. Do not waste your precious time in idle and miserable envy.
2. Viewing world as illusion. “The whole world with its enjoyments, wealth and luxury is quite illusory. What do I gain by being jealous of another?” When anyone thinks like this seriously several times daily, the thought waves of jealousy will slowly die. This thought is the root of all miseries. It is deep-rooted.
3. Feeling of universal brotherhood. You are not jealous of your intimate friend or loving brother. In these cases, you have become one with your friend or brother. You feel inwardly that all that belong to them is yours. You will have to do this with everybody. You will have to love everybody as your brother or friend. Then you will have no thought of jealousy.
4. Believe in, “May all people be happy”. You have said it numerous times in temples and other places of prayers. It is about time you practiced it. It is a golden principle that you must adopt if you wish to rise above petty jealousy. Think that you and others, being fragments of the Universal Soul, are the fingers of the same palm. Among whom no jealousy can exist in spite of differences in their lengths. If one of your children is more intelligent than you, you are not jealous of him or her. Are you? Why? Think, can’t you love others the same way. If your friend or your colleague or your relative is enjoying some advantages over you now, be happy for him or her. Surely your turn will also come. Full justice is meted out to all individual souls in the long run. This is the divine law. Have faith and adopt this spirit in action.
5. This is a developed stage. Repeat the formula ‘I am the all,’ ‘I am all-in all.’ Feel yourself everywhere. Think there is nothing save Soul, your own Self, everywhere. Jealousy will slowly vanish by entertaining this Soul-Expression. You must always entertain this idea “Vasudeva is all”. “Vasudeva” means all-pervading. You will have infinite joy which can only be felt. It cannot be adequately described in words.
If you place a big mirror in front of a dog and keep some bread in front, the dog at once barks by looking at its reflection in the mirror. It foolishly imagines that there is another dog. Even so, man sees his own reflection only through his mind-mirror in all the people, but foolishly imagines like the dog that they are all different from him and fights on account of hatred and jealousy.
1. Mind – Its Mysteries and Control by Sri Swami Sivananda
2. How to Deal with Jealousy by Gyan Rajhans