There are three ways of destroying the thought waves of anger and lust: (1) You can drive them through will-force. This is, no doubt, difficult and taxing. It exhausts your energy much. (2) Entertain counter-thoughts. thoughts of purity and love. This is easy. (3) Live in Truth or Soul. There are no thoughts of any kind in Soul. Soul is thoughtless and ever pure. This method is a perfect and powerful one.
Conquer passion. It will then be easy to subdue anger, which is only one of its followers. Control anger by love. Anger is a powerful energy that is uncontrollable by practical mind, but controllable by pure reason or Viveka(Power of discrimination).
When you become angry with a person when he fails to supply your usual Coffee on a day, raise a question within yourself: .Why should I be a slave to Coffee?. Then the wave of anger will at once naturally subside. It will not arise on other occasions also, if you are careful and thoughtful.
Control anger by forgiveness, patience, tolerance, universal love, mildness, Viveka, Soul Awareness, and such other virtues. Forgive and pity the man who does you harm. Consider censure as a blessing, ornament and nectar. Bear reproach. Develop universal love by service, charity, awareness. Recall any calm and pure state, which when once brought to mind, suppresses the hatred and brings composure.
When anger is subdued, rudeness, pride and envy will vanish of themselves. Prayer and devotion will root out anger.
Practice of entertaining a counter-idea. When you get angry, fill the mind with the idea of love. If you are depressed, fill the mind with the idea of joy and exhilaration.
When you become intensely angry, leave the place immediately for half an hour. Take a long walk. Repeat the sacred Mantra, 108 times. Your anger will subside. I shall tell you another easy way. When you get angry, count from one to thirty. The anger will subside.
When anger tries to exhibit itself, observe silence. Keep quiet. Never utter a harsh word or obscene speech. Try to nip it before it emerges out from the subconscious mind. You will have to be very alert. It tries to come out suddenly. Before anger manifests, there is an agitation in the mind. You must try to extirpate this very agitation in the mind before it assumes a very gross form in the shape of twitching of muscles of the face, clenching of teeth, red eyes, etc. You will have to punish the mind well. You will have to impose self-restraint and punishment on yourself by way of fasting for a day whenever agitation manifests in the mind.
If you strive and make sincere effort to subdue your anger, the hatred subsides. Even then, a slight movement of impatience lingers although the angry feeling has gone. You must eschew this slight disturbance also. For a man who is leading a divine life, this is a very serious drawback.
Irritability is a weakness of the mind. If you are easily irritable, it is likely that you may do injustice to many. Remove this by the practice of patience, tolerance, mercy, love, etc.
Calmness of mind is a direct means to the realization of Soul (or the Highest Self). Verily a certain man in his behavior is calm. His calmness is noticed by everyone as he discharges his duties, large and small, beautifully well. Another man is calm in his behavior, in speech, which is noticed by everyone. For, by nature, he is friendly, sweet in speech, congenial, of a frank countenance, ready at greetings. You should be calm in all the three states. Towards such a one, the development of love is not difficult.
You must have the knack to keep the mind always in balance and in tune. Close your eyes. Dive deep into the Divine Source. Feel His Presence. Remember Him always. Practice His Name. Repeat His Name even while at work. You will gain immense spiritual strength. Meditate early in the morning before you mix with people. You must rise above the thousand and one things which would irritate you easily in the course of your daily life. Then only you can turn out wonderful work daily with harmony and concord.
Mind – Its Mysteries and Control by Sri Swami Sivananda